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Dating a basic girl

January 29,2018 0 comments

Who is a basic girl? They are those enchanting, endearing, cute, charming but pretty much mindless and unauthentic ladies who do things they think makes them unique and edgy; but in all honesty, those are the things other basic girls do as well. They are ardent loyal followers of trends who never seem to have an original thought in their heads. The urban English would define them as blonde.

It is true that they can be fun to be around: but if you are not interested in a girl whose mood is determined by the number of likes she got from the social media sites like Facebook, then you are not ready to date a basic girl. She is the type of girl who will not take a bite of the food set in front of her before taking a perfect picture for Instagram. The picture will not be complete without a couple of related but totally unnecessary tonnes of hashtags; #foodisbae #kukumanenos #lunchtings #kfc #youonlyeatonce.

There are several ways to spot a basic girl. Well, you can find her in her natural habitat in the various social media sites posting pictures of the latest occurrences in their lives. If they manage to buy the latest knock-off Gucci sweatpants with a matching hat, be sure you will be duly informed about it. They always wear leggings and loose t-shirts or sweatshirts when running errands. It is a standard requirement, I guess. Here are signs that you are dating a basic girl.

Her social media posts come with a million hashtags. This is one media tool that is consistently and totally abused by these basic girls. They have turned it into a cyber litter. To them, a photo caption is not complete without a million hashtags to go with it: #trapqueen,  #myownboss, #bossbabe, #facts, #relationshipgoals , #gogetter and #selfboss , you name it. Maybe it is their way of swaying our attention from the magnitude of makeup clearly visible on their photos. It has reached a point where it has gotten out of hand. For your information, hashtags were effective tools in group postings with similar topics, promoting community awareness, rallying the community support and raising awareness on various issues affecting the community. Most importantly, it is an uphill task to read words with no spaces between them. #Spaceshaveapurpose.

To basic girls, food is for two things, survival and social media post. If you happen to be on a date with her, do not dare to touch the food before she takes a perfect aerial picture of the food first. It doesn’t matter if you bought it or you are almost dying of hunger, she has to take a perfect shot, worthy to be on her social media pages. Well, she may take a hundred pictures and delete them all, only to start over again. Just be a little more patient. The whole world has to know what she is eating. Did I forget to mention that the restaurant has to be Instagram worthy? Be prepared to take her on a date to places that are amazing. And by amazing I mean places that are social media worthy. You cannot take her to dine at a local hotel and expect her to be jovial about it and take pictures. I bet you a million dollars she will not even dare taste the food let alone take one photo for memory sake.

Be ready to be her personal photographer.  You have to also have extra skills to help her pick filters and captions for her pictures. Being a boyfriend of a basic girl automatically makes you her unpaid personal photographer. This means, your arm will be her human selfie stick in pictures which you will be carefully cropped out of most of the time. You have to take perfect pictures that will amass the most likes on Facebook. You will know all her right angles and learn how annoying it is that the iPhone flips your photo after taking a picture. Half a month into the relationship and she will have brushed your skills on picking the best filters for her photos. So you better be a fast learner.

Your emoji and one word texts game will never be stronger. You will get used to her one-word replies and emoji replies. You will be fluent in emojis. You will know what she means when she replies with a grinning face, smiling face, winking face, neutral face, face with an open mouth or face with tongue. Most men are familiar with the reply “K.”

Most of her conversations are gossip, baseless and nothing more. There is nothing she can talk of other than celebrities and the latest trends. Other than that, all other conversations with her are just small talk. But you accept it because it keeps the relationship going. They pull out of deep conversations that are rich in emotions, information and deeper respect faster than you can say the word okay. In short, they cannot hold a meaningful conversation at all.

They often communicate the desire of gifts in form of vague hints. It goes without saying that most men never get hints, let alone vaguely communicated ones.

“I saw Natalie with a beautiful pearl necklace. It really looked nice on her neck, “she would say, instead of just genuinely expressing the desire to own a pearl necklace. If a man genuinely wanted to get you a gift, but you hinted at it yourself, he will feel as if it was not his decision. It ends up making him feel bad and guilty for no apparent reason.

They cry for no apparent reason. It is no doubt that a woman’s tears are at the top of men’s fears. They usually do not know what to do, especially if we do not have the slightest idea what evoked it. More often than not, basic girls use tears to win an argument. If it becomes a habit, it causes a lot of irritation and leaves you both bitter.

She acquires expensive taste on your tab. We know a couple of lasses who are accustomed to using buses but insist on taking an Uber on your tab. You are most familiar with ladies ordering expensive delicacies when in the company of men.

Does she abbreviate nearly every word? Does she add “haha” to her texts to make them seem less rude? Does she follow every single Victoria Secret model on Instagram? Is her casual look leggings? Does she communicate entirely on emojis? Does she refer to her group of friends as “bitches”? Does she take horoscopes seriously? Does she have inspirational quotes everywhere? If your answer is affirmative, then she is a basic girl.

Deogracious Oliech Oginga

Where there is a will there is a way..

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